I am not the one you're looking for because I am way beyond your standards. I know this may sound like I am boasting, but I am just stating some facts here. If you are curious what made me say such things, then don't hesitate to send me a message.

There are times when I get sad without any reason at all and when those times happen, I usually touch my axe wound in order to compensate for my sadness. And to be honest, it actually works most of the time! So, whenever I get sad, I guess you alread...

I'm an open book. I've got nothing to hide. Take that either literally or figuratively speaking. Anyway, you can ask anything about me. The sky's the limit. I'm excited to be entertained with your awesome questions drizzled with a bit of playfulness.

This may sound a bit exaggerated, but I think I can be the best lady for you here. If you may, please look beyond my old appearance, and have a peek at my personality. I am an easygoing lady who loves having crazy nights filled with endless drinking ...

When doing any job, it is important to have the right set of tools. I am looking for a lad who has a 6-inch tool or bigger between his legs. Things might be a little loose on my cave, so I only need someone who can make it feel tight again.